I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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