next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
