Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
