Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
