saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
