I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
