he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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