I hate all girls vehemently.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
