I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
