ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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