haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
