Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
