PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
