her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
