I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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