dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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