He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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