All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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