But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
