hotel room ftw
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
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