This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
