I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
