In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
