im gay
i know
yea but for you.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
