and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Randomize
