Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Randomize
