On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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