Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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