Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I just found a bag of teeth...
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
