why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
