just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
