So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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