Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
