I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
she peed on how many people?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
