Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
