wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
