He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
