How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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