if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
