We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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