Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
