yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize