U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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