I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
