Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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