if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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