Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
