So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
