Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
