Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize